edited to add

Right now I am in the process of editing my book and getting it ready to be reprinted. I am hoping to get a lot of this done on the 11 hour drive up to Idaho next week. However I will be traveling with 7-9 other people (all in the same car) I am not setting my expectations too high.

The pros of this trip:
1. I get to spend a lot of time with my family
2. I get to see my wonderful grandparents
3. I get to see my little sister at such a wonderful time in her life
4. I get to go to Idaho!
5. I have lots of gifts for everyone, and I love giving gifts
6. It will test my patience up and down, hopefully I will pass with flying colors

The cons of this trip:
1. I am not used to spending 24/7 around lots of people anymore
2. I will be without Jake for a whole week
3. I will be without Jake for a whole week
4. I will be without Jake for a whole week
5. There is a really long drive involved, and I have to pee all the time
6. I will not be able to sleep in my own bed for 7 nights
7. I will be without all the comforts of my house
8. I will be missing my little sister in laws birthday and party :(
9. I will not have my own car to getaway in
10. It will test my patience up and down, and I'm not looking forward to that

Ok so I know it looks like the cons outweigh the pros, but there is more worth to the pro reasons than most of the con reasons. Like getting to see my grandparents! I never get to see them, and I love them dearly! I am having a lot of anxiety about being apart from Jake for that long. I almost don't want to go for that reason. It is really breaking my heart. I know a lot of couples spend time apart, but Jake and I don't really do that. We go out of our way to not spend the night apart. I have and will be going with him for both of his work conferences this year. We spent 6 days at his parents so that I could be with him last week. I was so uncomfortable on that air mattress, but I was with him every night. We even went out for coffee one morning :) Jake is my best friend and I can really be myself around him. I can let go and just be. I will really miss that for the next week starting on Sat. It will be so sad driving into to Sacramento together and watching him drive away without me. Ok ok ok, enough. I am sure you get what I am saying. Its just that this is so huge for me. And I am feeling more anxious as the days fly by and it gets closer. I pray the week apart will go by well, and that I won't dwell on the bad. For this trip, and for my intelligence in general, I got out my electronic version of scrabble and have been playing that today. I used to be a pretty good speller, but through the years I feel like I've lost my touch. So I thought playing it might help keep me sharp :)

Thanks to Shelly, I have reopened my Tumblr account and added a ton of users to my "following" list. I am loving it! I have an obsession with looking at photos, so tumblr is perfect! I haven't posted anything myself because I already have a blog, and need to focus on that. I am trying to refocus my energy in general lately. I picked out two new books. I plan on reading more books again. I was really into reading last year. I picked one love story and one sad story (but inspiring). I also found two wonderful cards today that I plan on sending out soon to some friends or family. I reorganized my lush stuff (again), and its all in one area now. I bought a large flat basket while staying in SF for really cheap (its actually a picnic food cover to keep flies off your food, but when turned upside down it looks like a basket!) and dumped/placed all my lush items in it and it fits PERFECTLY underneath my bed :) For now I really like it. But knowing me, I will not be satisfied for much too long :)

"When my world is shaking, Heaven stands.
When my heart is breaking, I never leave your hand."

I feel so frail today